Optimistic
by southern cross
Summary: Canon pairings end of S1. What should have been said and done.


A year ago I stumbled accidentally into the Roswell fandom, and fell in love, this was written out of frustration to the S1 finale. So please enjoy, read and review. I own nothing and mean no harm.

* * *

Forty-eight hours ago everything had fallen apart. Well it had been unraveling for sometime, but to see and hear things so vividly just gave things a harsher reality.

In another time, another life Max had belonged to Tess and she had belonged to Michael. Maybe that's how it had been but that wasn't the way it was going to be. Laying in bed two nights ago, frustrated and scared, she had come to the realization that no matter what had happened before she could never be with Michael _that_ way.

Her betrothed The thought was ridiculous. Everyone had been so focused on hearing who they had been that no one stopped to consider who they were. By luck of the draw she and Max had been raised brother and sister. What if it had been Max and Tess or her and Michael.

It may have been the intention of her family to reestablish the same connections amongst the four of them here on Earth, but the crash changed all of that. Their separation had, in her opinion, irrevocably altered the 'destiny' originally planned.

And why had no one brought up how wrong that was? That they were clones, copies, replicas, of dead royalty whose sole purpose was to recreate all that had happened in order to play the hero? Unfair. Uncool. It was insulting.

Isabel Evans was more than a copy. And yes, maybe, they did have to save their home world, but they would do it because it was right, not because it was 'destiny.' At least that was her spin on things.

Her take on the situation had eased her worried mind. Resolved resigned she had sat down yesterday and laid it out for him

Finding the words had not been this hard before. The long stretch of silence had not caught her off guard. No, talking to Max had been smooth. The words, reasons, explanations had slipped easily (not painlessly, but easily) into the space between her and her brother.

Had she known things would not gone so simply the second time around she would have been better prepared.

The talk she had planned on having, the moving and heart felt speech, had died the second Liz Parker had turned her dark eyes on her. Unsettling, powerful, it was no wonder Max spent half his life staring into them. God, his gaze was as absorbing, it was no wonder they saw no one but each other.

And yet she digressed she was here for a reason, she had a purpose. A mission to set things right, sitting, staring into the ravine, was not getting anything done.

"How is he Iz?"

Pain, pain, pain. It rolled off the younger girl in waves.

"He's devastated. Absolutely devastated."

Maybe it was harsh, but it was the truth. And hey at least she was speaking.

"That's actually why I wanted to meet you."

A lucky phone call this morning from a frantic Maria, 'Liz was freaking' 'Liz was leaving' and she had known what needed to be done.

Max was so gonna owe her for this.

"What happened two days ago was so unfair and not just to you and Max, but for me and Michael too."

Ignoring the startled gasp and growing frown, she plowed on.

"I mean I know you and Max have the whole star-crossed lovers thing going on, but the news wasn't exactly good in terms of what Michael or I would have wanted."

Obviously Liz wanted to comment or console, but she cut her off with a smile and a wave of her hand.

"It's no big. Really."

And it wasn't.

"Actually it was better this way. Gave me time to think, really think about things you know."

Her brain was about ready to mutiny. With all the thinking she had done.

"I realized something two nights ago. Something important."

She wondered how Liz had spent that night. She knew how Max had. In anger, in tears, in pain, but again she digressed. 'Focus.'

"Right, so this thing. It's big you know life-altering. Scary."

This time she didn't flinch under the scrutiny of the dark eyes.

"So big in fact I had to sit my brother down yesterday and have the most important conversation I've ever had with him."

God, she had been so scared.

"It was scary, you know, knowing that what we talked about would, you know, could, change everything. That he might hate me after. Or God, be disappointed."

No one did disappointed like Max. Actually she felt sorry for any future Max offspring that may have to endure the whole 'I'm not upset, just disappointed' angle, because no one did that like Max.

"I had to sit him down and look him in the eye and tell him that yes I would fight for the home that I didn't know, that I would die for that cause, sure, but that in no way would I be doing that with Michael by my side in that way."

So maybe she had rambled a little and the words had bunched the words at the end but she had sort of made her point. Liz looked like someone had punched her in the head.

"The four of us may have to stand together, fight together, I do believe that but I am not willing to give up any more of myself and Michael shouldn't have to or Max."

Maybe Liz was crying for her or Max or herself, and really it didn't matter, reaching over she took the shaking hand and squeezed it tight.

"Liz I am going to do what's right, what's best. I am going to keep the people around me who make me strong, who keep me safe and in doing that I will make my own destiny."

Oh, those eyes wet with tears, not quite as troubled as before, it could even be hope she was looking at. The smiled they exchanged were shaky at best.

"Max, God, you should have seen him. It was like a weight had been lifted. He understood, thank God, not angry, not disappointed. Relieved."

Oh, yeah. Max owed her big. Liz was crying in earnest now. The great big, hiccuping sobs that just carried so much out of your soul.

"He loves you, Liz. He needs you. Just like Michael needs Maria and I want Alex."

Alex. Next time she saw him she was grabbing on and not letting go.

"Stay. Fight. With us. With him."

There. She had said it. Done all she could. Their embrace was fierce, desperate. Liz clung to her as though she were drowning and in a way she was. They all were, but she had thrown Liz a lifeline, a floatie and she hoped to God she would take it.

* * *

"Dammit."

That was the third time he had tripped over a rather large, rather obvious rock. He was distracted. 'Understatement.'

Isabel sure knew how to upend things. Waltzing into his bedroom all worried eyes and nervous energy and life-altering declarations.

How had she put it so clearly? So cleanly? How had it all made sense coming from her?

That didn't matter. What mattered was his sister's realization and decision.

Isabelle had chosen to make her own destiny, she was not going to be ruled by what had been. Her fear that her decision would upset him shamed him. How had he not considered, really considered, how insanely horrible everything had to be for Michael and Isabelle.

So he had talked, really talked and listened to his sister. About what she wanted, what she was afraid of, what she would or wouldn't sacrifice. And in doing so had answered many of those questions for himself.

In his heart he knew he would never be with Tess, could never be with her. The person that had been her other half was not him. Well it was, but not really. The same pieces, yes, but to an entirely different puzzle.

Isabelle had saved him, given him hope that he might have the future he wanted with whomever he chose.

And now he had to share that with Michael.

Michael. After the revelation in the chamber he had disappeared. Max checked all the 'usual' haunts and was now on the third 'unusual' option.

A random patch of desert not as picturesque as the ravine, or as accessible but he and Michael had wandered out here once or twice and had found the solitude comforting.

If he was right, and he hoped he was, the walk was long, and the sun brutal, Michael should be in the lean-to they had slapped together, just over the next rise.

'Bingo.'

The slouched form and long legs were unmistakable. He approached silently, his footsteps enough of a warning of his arrival.

"Maxwell."

Dropping to the ground, the relief from the shade was immediate.

"Michael."

Talking to Michael was always tricky. You could never quite know which direction you were really headed in until you got there.

"I'm not hooking up with your sister."

And that was certainly one direction he hadn't thought Michael would take.

"OK."

He was playing catch up now.

"I mean, it was great hearing the story and seeing the little picture show, but seriously, they do not get to tell me who I hook up with, and I am so not hooking up with Iz. Yuck."

Max snorted. He understood the frustration, the absurdity of the ideas, pairing and cloning and destiny, it was just a lot to take in. Looked like Michael had took it in and made a decision.

"You talk to Liz yet?"

He had wanted to, had considered it, but it was Michael who came first, who would always come first.

"I wanted to find you first. I was worried."

Max knew he was the only one who could tell Michael that, tell him that, and mean it. They shared a look, a fleeting moment, but Max could see how much that meant, how good it felt to be put first.

But as quickly as it appeared, the look faded, "Idiot."

Michael rolled his eyes as Max chuckled, "Go find your girl, make it all better, and all that mushy crap."

It was a good suggestion, a great one actually, one that he rose, with every intention of doing; pausing, he lowered a hand waving his fingers at Michael.

"What?" the question was irritating, but Max didn't move.

"You're coming with, I'm pretty sure there is someone else waiting for it to be all better," it would be just like Michael to push Liz at him if only to avoid having a special conversation with Maria. Predictable for him, but not fair to either.

Michael pointedly ignored his hand, "Nah you go, I'm going to stay here, got some stuff to think through," while no doubt true, if let to his own devices Michael thinking could days forever.

"You've had enough time to think, we all have, it's time to do."

He would stand there as long as it took, Liz would understand the delay, it was one of the many things he loved about her.

"Michael," he waggled his fingers, waiting didn't mean he couldn't egg him on a bit.

"Ugh, fine, whatever," Max smiled, adjusting his feet to help Michael.

Everything was going to be OK now, it may be a little naive and a whole lot of optimistic, but they were taking charge of their destinies, and now with the people they cared most by their sides, how could everything not be fine.


End file.
